Introverts are not created equal, and the way we connect with the outside world differs from person to person. However, one thing connects us all: the need to retreat and recharge in our own space. Introverts often feel like their boundaries are being pushed, so you should know these 17 things introverts don’t like doing—so don’t make them.
Being the center of attention
We hate the spotlight and feel extremely uncomfortable being the center of attention. In many situations, we much prefer to fade into the background or be part of a group rather than be the sole focus. We are extremely self-conscious when the attention is on us and it dramatically drains our energy.
Last minute plans
While introverts are not averse to social plans, we do need a little time to mentally prepare ourselves. Last minute plans are simply a no go, they catch us off guard and fill us with dread. According to Introverted, Dear, introverts hate last minute plans because we love preparation and hate uncertainty.
Making phone calls
The thought of picking up the phone fills an introvert with anxiety. Whether it’s making a simple appointment or something more important, if there is an email or a live chat, introverts will use that option rather than picking up the phone. So, if there is a phone call someone else can make, don’t make the introvert do it.
Going to crowded places
There are many reasons why introverts do not like going to crowded places, and it is typical for them to try to avoid them at all costs. There is a lot of social pressure associated with visiting crowded places, and this is a massive drain on our energy. Crowded places are also loud and involve more interaction with strangers.
Networking
Networking is something most people need to do to succeed in their career but introverts simply hate it. Meaningless and false interactions are strongly disliked by introverts and networking is mainly just small talk. Insead found that we are hardwired to hate networking and 90% of introverts find it extremely uncomfortable.
Small talk
Introverts spend a lot more time alone than extroverts and with all this solitude, we have a deeper connection to our thoughts and feelings. We prefer deep conversation and hate surface level chit chat. We simply don’t know what to say when it comes to small talk, and much prefer a topic we can sink our teeth into.
Interacting with loud people
Even the most extroverted introvert has a low tolerance for loud people. The social battery of an introvert depletes a lot quicker and interactions with loud people puts this on a fast track. All About Introverts also found that introverts typically have a higher sensitivity to noise and can quickly become overstimulated.
Public speaking
It can be easily said that no one likes public speaking, but some people thrive in this environment. However, the people who do enjoy it are usually extroverts, and introverts are usually anxious about the idea. Addressing large crowds of strangers is incredibly intimidating, and we won’t do it unless we absolutely have to.
Unexpected interaction
When you meet an introvert in public, they can sometimes come across as rude, but this is simply because we weren’t expecting the interaction. We need more time to mentally prepare for interactions, and bumping into someone in the street catches us off guard. This can even apply to the closest relationships, so don’t be offended if the introvert in your life is a little off.
Attending meetings
Have you ever thought a meeting could have been an email? Well, Inc.com found that one-third of meetings are completely unnecessary. Many meetings are scheduled for the social aspect rather than for the content, and most of the information can be communicated differently. The social setting of attending a meeting is an energy thief, meaning we have little time for other interactions.
Receiving unplanned house calls
The sound of the doorbell fills us with unease if we weren’t expecting someone to show up. In addition to not being prepared for this interaction, we’re probably deeply in recharge mode, and this unexpected house call is interrupting our alone time. A knock on the door puts an introvert on edge when we have no idea who is on the other side.
Sharing space
When alone time is our safe space, sharing our environment can be extremely difficult. Whether sharing a room with a sibling, having a roommate, or moving in with a partner, introverts have difficulty sharing their space. It is incredibly draining to be in a living situation where we’re never alone.
Answering unknown numbers
Phone calls are a major hurdle for an introvert as it is and typically, we will avoid them at all cost. When an unknown number comes through, and we don’t know who is going to be at the other end of the phone, we get a certain level of anxiety.
Getting involved in conflict
Introverts simply hate conflict and are often seen as people pleasers for avoiding conflict. Many introverts are empaths and we deeply feel the emotions of everyone involved. Feeling so much emotion in a conflicting situation is very overwhelming and our own emotions can be masked by a need to protect others.
Being around people for too long
Even introverts love being social, the difference is, we have a limit. Our energy drops the longer we are interacting with people and at some point, we will hit our maximum interaction time and feel a deep need to be alone. We have a great tolerance for people in moderation but being around people for too long is incredibly draining.
Meeting multiple strangers
Whilst introverts are not averse to meeting new people, we prefer to meet strangers one by one rather than in groups. Being thrown into a social situation where we are suddenly expected to communicate with multiple strangers at a time makes us retreat and we then don’t connect with anyone.
Being called shy
We’re not shy, we just have a different style of interaction, and it takes longer for us to open up. Calling us shy just highlights a personality trait many introverts are already insecure about and we seriously dislike being labeled as shy. It feels like introvert-shaming when we’re mocked for being shy.
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